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Itty Bitty Book Wait

January 22, 2014

Just I can’t make bricks without clay (actually, I’d be hard put to make bricks even with clay), I can’t make several of the midweek posts I have planned until some books I’ve ordered meander into my mailbox. Fortunately, there’s the classic blogger stalling device to fall back on, namely, weird search terms. I’m not getting as many of these, since more engines are starting to realize that their users prefer a mysterious, stealthy approach in which not even a random blogger will ever discover that there’s someone in the world searching for “joke mayan sexpot.” Still, such as they are, here they are:

did king henry viii make the decree for valentines day

Apparently not, although lots of websites tell us that he did so on February 14 1537. Here is my post about how Henry has celebrated Valentine’s Day in fiction — there don’t seem to be many traces remaining of how he celebrated it in fact.

was anne boleyn’s first child a boy

Well, there’s the “controversial new theory” that Elizabeth I was really a man, though it’s not new, and controversial only if you set the bar for debate very, very low.

what did anne boleyn do with her second child

Bore and buried it. Unless her first child actually was a son, in which case her second child was Elizabeth and we have a pretty good idea of what happened to her.

anne boleyn files children

I know what you were saying, but I still got a smile out of picturing Anne trying to stuff a child (probably a recalcitrant Princess Mary) into the A-M drawer of her office cabinet.

18century incest porn

I’m sure it exists, but I’m not going to look for it.

was guildford dudley really cruel

Nobody knows. He was sixteen when he died, so he probably didn’t get much of a chance to be “really” anything, whether it was the hot, doomed romantic of Lady Jane or the veteran rapist of Innocent Traitor.

herbal douches for contraception

John Gaddesden’s 14th century Rosa Anglica recommended mint douches. I wouldn’t put much more faith in them than drinking cold water, eating lettuce, and jumping backwards after coitus, which it also recommends.

how i seduce a god fearing stepmom

Henry VIII managed pretty well with Catherine Parr, so that’s one success story. Of course, you’ll want to bear in mind that Henry’s rougher tactics wouldn’t be looked on too favourably by modern law enforcement.

mark smeaton

He’s managed to dethrone George Boleyn! Though I doubt this means that George is losing popularity; on the contrary, I know that Clare Cherry and Claire Ridgeway have a biography of him coming out soon, which has been getting him some attention and pushing my own essay on George further down in the search results. Mark Smeaton, the much-slandered, has now taken his place as far and away the most searched-for man on this blog, at least until someone decides to come out with a biography of him.

anne boleyn blowjob

Some things never change.

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